Nothing is unfit for research!

While looking for some abstracts, I came across these 4 articles. It was mildly amusing reading them. It was comforting too because sometimes I get this feeling that may be I am wasting my time pursuing what I'm doing now! BTW, these are real research papers (you can check PubMed).

1. This is not fiction! I am reproducing the excerpt from the original paper which appeared in Trends in Biochemical Sciences 12: 252-254. This article has been cited at least 14 times!

"Our data does support the assertion that garlic may be beneficial in middle age Unfortunately, we could not obtain the most desired test system for anti-vampire' activity. Vampires may now be extinct (however, see Ref 9), and a search for the anti-vampire activity in garlic must await development of suitable analytical tools".

Original article: Jain MK and Apitz-Castro R. 1987. Garlic: molecular basis of the putative ‘vampire-repellant’ action and other matters related to heart and blood. Trends in Biochemical Sciences, 12: 252-254

2: J Trauma. 1984 Nov;24(11):990-1.
Injuries due to falling coconuts
Barss P.
Falling coconuts can cause injury to the head, back, and shoulders. A 4-year review of trauma admissions to the Provincial Hospital, Alotau, Milne Bay Province, Papua New Guinea, revealed that 2.5% of such admissions were due to being struck by falling coconuts. Since mature coconut palms may have a height of 24 up to 35 meters and an unhusked coconut may weigh 1 to 4 kg, blows to the head of a force exceeding 1 metric ton are possible. Four patients with head injuries due to falling coconuts are described. Two required craniotomy. Two others died instantly in the village after being struck by dropping nuts.

3: Br Med J (Clin Res Ed). 1984 Dec 22-29;289(6460):1717-20.
Falls from trees and tree associated injuries in rural Melanesians
Barss P, Dakulala P, Doolan M.
Falls from trees and other tree related injuries are the most common cause of trauma in some parts of rural Melanesia. A four year review of all admissions for trauma to the Provincial Hospital at Alotau, Milne Bay Province, Papua New Guinea, showed that 27% were due to falls from trees, and a further 10% were due to related injuries, such as being struck by a falling branch or a coconut. A questionnaire distributed to rural health centres showed that during the study period at least 28 villagers died from falls from trees before reaching hospital. Head and chest trauma were common causes of death. Many injured patients were boys. Forearm fractures were the most common injuries, but more serious injuries were also frequently encountered. Trees responsible for most deaths and injuries included the coconut palm, betel palm, mango, and breadfruit. There are many strategies for preventing such injuries; perhaps the most important is to stop small boys climbing tall trees. Such falls are a serious occupational hazard for many subsistence farmers.

4: Mil Med. 1993 Aug;158(8):546-8.
The constipated serviceman: prevalence among deployed U.S. troops
Sweeney WB, Krafte-Jacobs B, Britton JW, Hansen W.
Medical Department, USS Iwo Jima LPH-2, FPO New York, NY 09561-1625.

The prevalence of constipation in deployed servicemen was determined in a sample of military personnel aboard the USS Iwo Jima LPH 2 during Operation Desert Shield. Results were obtained from a bowel function questionnaire issued to 500 deployed marines and sailors. When constipation is defined as no bowel movement for greater than 3 days, 3.9% of the Marine/sailor personnel are constipated when in their home environment as compared to 6.0% when they are aboard ship and 30.2% while in the field. Alternatively, when constipation is defined as the presence of certain anorectal complaints (hard stools, straining, painful defecation, and bleeding with defecation), the incidence is 7.2% when at home as compared to 10.4% aboard ship and 34.1% in the field. These results confirm that whether constipation is defined as infrequent bowel movements or presence of symptoms of constipation, significantly more servicemen will be constipated when in the field as compared to their home environment. Since approximately one-third of Navy/Marine Corps personnel deployed in a field environment will be constipated, preventive measures ought to be evaluated.